Beware of neighborhood planter-snatchers

A friend of mine was complaining that her overly-sensitive car alarm had awakened them the other night. It seems some little miscreant had the nerve to try jiggling the car door in her driveway, to see what goodies could be had.

It should be noted that most of us here live in suburban utopias. Garages are used to store excess stuff rather than cars, and imaginary walls keep out the riff-raff, or at least the petty criminals who may try to take advantage of an unlocked vehicle with purse or wallet clearly visible on the passenger seat.

That my friend not only locks the one vehicle in the driveway, but also sets the alarm (and, omigod, she actually parks their 2nd car INSIDE the garage!) probably is just another way in which we don't fit in developers' paradise. It's her neighbors that are practically calling for the vultures, with their cash, purses, Ipod's and such clearly visible and easily available.

And I'm sure it doesn't help that amongst the trash left on the curb every week are various boxes for computers (can't miss that cow pattern!), big screen tv's and the like. One of my neighbors called it "curb envy" ... who's got the biggest, most expensive crap in their home theaters.

Oh, but the friendly local trash pickers/riff-raff/whatever you want to call them were far more interested in my cheap, plastic, end of the driveway planter. Or maybe it was the local do-gooder who was overwhelmed by the ugliness of last fall's plants, recently uncovered by the newly melted snow? Whatever, whoever, somebody relieved me of my planter, dirt, dents and all (yes, I've hit it with the car, that's why it's there, to keep my tires off the grass). They were kind enough to remove the dead plants, the remains of a couple of mini pumpkins, and place them on the ground in its place. Did they think I wouldn't notice?